wine tasting

Ooops, I was supposed to go to a Wine tasting in South Ken but I do not seem to know where my keys are and my spare is with my Sister in West Norwood. So, I am dress up and no where to go. I got this LBD and Killer shoes and looking delicious. Oh Hum.

I am just going to have Rose and Strawberries with some coconut rice, peas and tomato pesto(Nigerian Style) :)))

I was really looking forward to going out. I have been on holiday in Kenya and Mozambique for 6wks and mostly wearing a bikini and sarong all day. I was really looking forward in working around in killer heels and towering over everyone (6ft 1inch). I learnt some funny lessons on my trip. I kinda stop checking guys out after having and ending a long distance on-off relationship with a Scottish Dude.
Last Christmas, I met a guy on my travels who in a way re-ignited things and I have since decided to go out there and get myself a nice boyfriend. Anyway, I noticed while on my travels that I have totally forgotten how to flirt. I am great flirting with men, I do not fancy like the Great Dane (a stunning handsome George Pepperd lookalike- Handsome man in Breakfast at Tiffany) or Mr P(Sex on legs). I used to be a Tom Boy with really good looking male friends so its no big deal...but those guys I really liked I became a complete mess. A female Hugh Grant.

Ho Hum, while in Nairobi waiting for my flight to Pemba Mozambique I met a bunch of Nairobi Chicks. I was reading a horrible book that was over hyped by the UK Media, mostly male pensioner I suspect about this German teenage girl who was obsessed by her arse and her arse hole. The press where saying its a feminist book....I think its a disgusting book and there is nothing to be learnt from it.Ok, the girl is not a teenager but through out the book she sounds like a child or a teenager. Anyway, I was reading this book and one of the Girls Ariel mentioned she loved my watch. Then I went away to get a pedi and came back and decided to share a bottle of wine with them especially since they looked like a fun group. They were all thin, with really long hair (from Brazil) and spoke good English. They seemed to be ladies who lunched. A few of them had White(Muzungu) Boyfriends or Husbands so they were well travelled. Others had their own businesses. One of them was amazingly beautiful and very tiny...although I thought it was funny that she was in full make up...foundation, fake eyelash, blusher the works...almost like a Tranny and it was 40degrees. I really was struggling with my Mac lipstick and was hoping it didn’t melt away in the heat and the sweat. Anyway, I thought it was fun to just hang, Ariel was married to an English man who worked for the UN and she had a son Jacob. Her friends seemed fun. Anyway, I went to Pemba and the came back and hanged out with them and met more of their friends. I went off to Mombasa (Not real destination) and Ariel called up and told me her husband was beating her up. First I said, I was sorry she was going through this and then she asked me what she should do so I suggested that she should take some time off and spend a wk end somewhere so she can think of her next step. Later she asked if she can come to where I was and I helped her book a room for her and her nanny.

When she came I was off deep sea fishing in a Yacht with my friends and I really didn’t want to cancel, one can’t look a gift horse in the mouth. I was so excited that She came and she brought her friend Maya and her Son, who is adorable. There are three dogs in the hotel and all of them are owned by friends of mine who live or work on the Island...sadly Jacob would cry for hours when he saw them. The Sharon decided to dress in her cocktail dress and high heeled shoes on her first night. All the men from the Island (mostly very wealthy pensioners) descended to the bar and too Ariel. Prior to Ariel’s arrival she mentioned that she wanted to leave the UN husband and find someone else. I told her that I was on an Island with some interesting guys and I suggested on Dude a likely blind date.

However, once she came to the bar in her high heeled shoes and her massive boobs (called Blue eyes by my friends) all bets where off. Instead of focusing on one man she was chatting up everyone. There was one French pensioner who was soo ugly but he was super wealthy so she spent a long time flirting with him in the bar front of his 20yr old daughter, who was spying from the window, while his wife was having dinner in the restaurants. The daughter was in tears and was being comforted by a sleazy Italian guy.

The next day I mentioned if she wanted to move to my hotel it cost $40 a night and a huge Queen size bed with amazing view of the Island and I brought her round to check it out, later I got the feeling that she was about to close a deal on another house. I didn't know for sure as she was speaking Swahili. Anyway, she later came back to me and mentioned that she is moving to this amazing house. She asked me to move in with her.I was pissed off and I went to see it with her and yes it was amazing. So, after thinking about it I moved in...however, there was a beach boy who was all over Ariel. I could never get the chance to really enjoy the amazing view because Beach Boy lover was always there...either all over Ariel or playing with Ariel's son. I thought it was disgusting for a one night stand to play with my kid. Also, the Nanny was not the sharpest tool in the draw...many times Ariel's Son stood at the top of the stairs of a 4 story Omani designed house and he kept playing at the balcony. I just kept thinking of Eric Clapton's son. I was getting hypertension every time Jacob moved near the stairs or the balcony but his Mother really didn't give to hoots...she just wanted her Lover Lover Beach Boy.

So, one day after 2days I moved back to my hotel. The Chef was better and I felt that it was more private. They did ask me why I said there is no security especially since I had expensive cameras, laptop, jewellery,clothes. I really didn't feel safe with the Riff and Raff coming and out of the place. The House Keeper asked and I said ...well the Baby's crying was way too much.

The Bar men, the waiters, the millionaires, the back packers ...everyone was a target. She even flirted with the oldest bar man to buy her a drink....I thought that was so UNCOOL. Even one of the hotel staff was had her mouth wide open watching the whole thing. The first night was amazing to see all these wealthy pensioners queuing up to chat to her...I did learn some flirting skills from her...However, she turned. She met a beach boy and they became inseparable. I told her to stay away from the male prostitutes who hang on the beach but she thought she was smarter. I mentioned that the locals talk to the Westerners so in the end everyone knows everyone's business. The next thing I saw was he became her lover and she would only speak Kikuyu or Swahili even when I was around. So, I stopped hanging out with her. She had alienated the women on the Island and was acting like a tramp that had just left jail after 40yrs. None of my friends liked her. Even my male friends were bored of her attention seeking ways. When this lady went ''hunting'' on man was safe. One day I came to the bar and was hanging out with the guy that I liked and she came with her mate and interrupted and started to stroke his leg and all up in his grill. In my book she could have all the Pensioners and their money but this one was mine however, it seemed she had no rules or limits. I had introduced her to my friends, introduce her to a society that she would never have met and even got her a nanny for her child and all she could do is flirt with the guy that I fancied. I went ballistic...but I decided why should I fight or argue with her when one of the rich women can easily kick her arse so I decided not to create a situation and move the hell away from her. Be polite and keep the conversation light and short.

The Beach Boy is nothing spacial, he is mixed race (African and Arab/0mani) and has curly hair. He sails a boat and actually the first day that Ariel came she was jump into the water and making a big show...showing how fit he was....I thought that was funny and what a simpleton. Can you imagine if he was on the pull in Collections...what would he do to get noticed :)))) Nevertheless, the Swimming and somersault and all the bravado worked on an equally simply crazy chick from Nairobi. While I was in the house the conversation was about how he is allergic to Lobster and the scars on his body HA HA HA. He then pushed Ariel to book a trip with him and they agreed a price, the plan was to go the next morning.

Maya and I got invited to go Snorkeling 3hrs away from the Island so we went and Ariel was with her Lover Boy Beach Boy on her trip. I heard she paid $100 to go to another island that is 10mins away from our hotel. I just laughed and laughed. She kept making arrangements in Swahili and I kept hearing stories behind her back. She was really paying a lot for very little. She kept saying the Beach Boy was a good man and was good with her son. I smiled and was thinking how lucky it is for me to move the hell out of this place...Maya had to stay and listen to this crazy lady especially since Ariel was paying for her trip and accommodation.
There was a guy we nicked named Monaco who was with his girl friend a thin girl who was young maybe 21 or 22 but she dressed old. She was not particularly pretty and I later learnt that she taught disable people in Monaco. I was previously introduced to them but she was very cold so I thought it would serve her right if Ariel took her man away from her. One day Ariel and I were chilling and the Guy made a long and loud phone call asking someone to get the Mansion ready and make sure all the 8 rooms are ready for his guest and blah blah blah and then he mentioned when he would arrive at the Airport in Monaco. So, we named him Monaco. Ariel was able to chat to him and he spoke to me 2days later saying that he really wanted to stay on the Island but his girlfriend would kill him. I just smiled and thanked my lucky stars that I was single.

Ariel did manage to meet Jonathan(Jon) but she told me she wasn't interested and preferred to go out with Monaco. Nevertheless, Monaco had to get back to his life in Europe so after she spent 3-4days loved up with the Beach boy she started to plot how to get Jonathan interested in her again. I was going to the other side of the Island and Ariel Show was going on...Ariel was pretending to play with her son on the beach with the help of the Nanny. Lucky for her Jonathan was around and they started talking, when I came back at Night I heard she spent the day with him, he paid for lunch and proceeded to take her to the local shops which are very expensive. She told me that Jon bought her a silk scarf , a top for her son and a necklace(£250) however, the necklace would cost £5 in China but it was great to see how people price these things. Then she told me that he gave her $2000 and proceeded to show me her wallet. I was shocked and appalled and I just wanted to have a bath as quickly as possible.

That night I had problems sleeping. I was thinking if I should contact Jon or sms me and tell him to stay away from Ariel.

Later that night I met Jon's friend Tea and I felt I had to apologise and as we started talking Tea, she asked me what I was doing with this gold digger and I am a Pearl and she is ....I said I was worried that Ariel was using Jon as an ATM machine and she told me that Jon did not give her $2000, a top for her son or bought her a silk scarf. He did buy the necklace which she wants back. She does not want her necklace on this ladies neck. Anyway, it was great to talk to her cos I was really getting stressed.

There was one pensioner who was so ugly but he was super wealthy so she spent a long time flirting with him in the bar front of his 20yr old daughter, who was spying from the window, while his wife was having dinner in the restaurants. In my book he was off limits...however, I realised she had no rules and no limits. One Italian guy who looked like Leo Sayer(in the 70s) was soooo into her but she was playing him big time and then she kept calling him Amore and he said you should stop calling me that as I do have a reputation. She told him, that he and his reputation can go and entertain himself to night. One wealthy man came and joined us for breakfast after meeting Ariel the day before .The men that was queuing up at the bar completely disappeared. The interest completely died. She told me that she was organising a party and wanted me to attend and I said sorry I was attending another party and I provided no details on who was given it and who was attending. On the last night I was invited to this amazing mansion, I was going to mention it to the girls as they really wanted to go to an Island mansion but due to their slapper behaviour I didn’t mention it and went to the ball and had a fabulous time .The next day at the small airport I saw her and asked how her party was and she said it lasted till 4am and everyone was there and I smile. She said she was invited to my party by some Italians but decided not to attend and to just chill out on her last night. I smiled and said that I saw the Italians and they did ask where she was and she smiled and asked what else did they say and I said nothing else. Actually, I have no clue who the Italians are but I heard from another Tourist that an Italian guy was forced to take Ariel home as she was drunk and off her rock and didn’t know where she lived so he was forced to bring her to his room and then mentioned to all his male friends that he could not even sleep on the same king size bed with her as she was in a bad way.

Anyway, I met this amazing lady the night before and I found to my surprise that we were on the same flight and got invited to stay in her home if and when I come back to the Island. At the back of the flight Ariel was doing her Ariel Show trying attracting another sucker to her game.

The Nairobi Chick Hustle, try to ignore compliements and they are gonna compliement the hell out of you and so you feel good and then they hit you with some sad story. Ignore the sad and helpless stories and don't get sucked into their drama or you might not be so lucky as me.